What have I done?

June 18th, 2008

Today was my first day of my work experience. I had arranged to work with my uncle at a company called ansa (links to come when I’m less drunk) which is a sort of insurance company.

Anyways, the job is in Oldham which is about 30 minutes away, straight down the motorway and when you turn off you are pretty much there. The day was pretty good, nice company, nice people, nice job and a nice drive. Twas really easy, got on the M60 and it was simple, a nice drive. I’d even done a recon with my dad the day before. So after I’d finished work I got in my little Ford Fiesta and started my trip back. Should only have taken me 30 mins but it was a bit longer than that.

I started to feel the car shake, I thought I might have been in the wrong gear or was driving over a chevron or something like that but no. So I decided to get off at the next exit…but then I realised I wouldn’t make it to the next exit when the car started shaking violently. I decided to pull onto the hard shoulder and just be done with it, I didn’t want to do this before encase I was making a mountain out of a mole hill.

I indicated left and then pulled to the left and as I did I saw my tire going off to the right. I was in complete shock, I didn’t know what was going on. I stopped and saw a couple of people run over my tire. Someone eventually stopped (I was still in the car and didn’t fathom what was going on) and I was just compelled to get out of the car and grab the tire off the inside lane and pull it over to the hard shoulder. I called my dad and the my uncle (who was close enough to help me out).

My uncle showed up about 10 minutes later and changed the tire for me and pretty much saved me. I was still in shock after what had happened and he even followed me all the way home as well. Getting back on the motorway was probably the best thing for me but it didn’t seem like it at the time. I think, even now some 7 hours afterwards, I’m still in shock about the whole thing!!!

I’m really angry about the whole thing but not angry at anyone thing or person, just angry. Probably why, when writing this in bed, I’ve smashed my hand off the wall about 12 or so times. Wouldn’t be soo bad if it was playful but i mean, truly smashed it off the wall, the skin is ripped off of all my knuckles and its a real pain to actually open up my hand and type. I don’t really know what’s up other than I’m still in shock. I think I just need to sleep but all I can see when I close my eyes is my tire flying past me.

I realise I’ve not always made the right choices in my life but I made the ones I thought were right and yet I feel so angry and so alone, now more than ever. I have made a lot of mistakes but I take full responsibility for them, nobody else was to blame but me, so I’ve moved past that, I hope others can to.

One Response to “What have I done?”

  1. Pepper Says:

    If you’re lucky you’ll get on Police! Stop! Camera! Go! or sommat.

Leave a Reply