Zyber’s Corner

A month after my accident and I’m still pretty fucked. Didn’t even remember posting the entry below this one, that’s how bad I’ve become. Since my accident I have barely been able to remember anything at all. I don’t think I’ve really come to terms with everything as this has put my life really into perspective. I’ve already started to try and make amends for every bad thing I’ve done in my life. My name is Earl-esque.

So what’s new? I’ve finished my work experience now, might decide to crack on with my novel now, get that finished off for publishing. I got a letter through about Uni, I won the John Ryan prize for excellence for my first year at university. This is basically for getting the highest marks on my course. Here is a copy of my letter. I’m dead chuffed about it and it’s actually made me re-evaluate uni as I was still debating whether or not to go back due to the reasons I actually started. But I digress.

Not long til XL now, seems like it’s gonna be pretty tough this time but i’m still looking forward from the break of being Matt so I can be Zyber. Some people might think they are the same person but they’re not, Zyber is who I like, who I want to be all the time but can’t. God I sound like an emo.

Anyway, I think I’ve bored you for enough. Night!

Right, guess it’s time to blog about my XL week, well that’s pretty much what it was. Headed down to ye old brummy on Wednesday which is a day before the set up because a mate of mine down there invited me to stay at his. Few beers etc. So headed down and my man Nero met me at the train station and we headed back to his gaff.

I actually met him for the first time at XL 3, he showed up to my hotel with a bottle of rum and 8 cans of Stella at 1.30am. The guy is a legend so I decided to repay his kindness with a bottle of Morgan Spice Rum for us to drink this time. Got to his place and met his wife and 2 sprogs (all really nice), his wifes best friend Jenny and another guy who I really cannot remember the name of…saying that I don’t remember most of the night. There were only 4 of us for most of the night and we got through 9 beers, a bottle of Vodka and the Morgan spice. No wonder I don’t remember the end of the night, I think I must have said some fucked up shit. Well Nero’s still talking to me so that’s a good sign. I didn’t go to bed til around 9am Thursday morning so when I rocked up to the NEC about 3pm I was still pretty shagged.

Met up with everyone and headed back to the hotel (twas lush) to check in and for a heavenly shower. Swear, I was sooo shagged that day, that cold shower was the best thing ever! Walked back over (yes you read that right, walked, we were that close to the NEC we could walk) and proceeded to set up. I say set up, I was really shagged and wasn’t much good. Jay kept asking me why I was soo down, I wasn’t down, just messed up. Jay turned to Chris and said “Jedey’s fucked!” Chris turns to me “You fucked mate?” and I go “Aye”. Chris came over and gave me a hug so I guess the weekend wasn’t a total loss :p

Spin, Becky, Razor and I had to make 468 lanyards and then 468 goodie bags, with loads of promotional shit into Race Driver: Grid bags. While doing this very repetitive task, something for which I was very grateful Jay suggested I do, me and Spin came up with a slogan for XL 4. XL4: don’t hate the player hate the game. Because, before even playing it, we were all sick of Race Driver: Grid, lol and the worst part is, I never got to play it. SADFACE.

We made it back to the hotel pretty late and got some kip. We woke up in time for breakfast which razor just wasn’t feeling that morning. We rocked up at the NEC to find the usual morning chaos. I met up with loads of my old friends and made some new ones. I’ll list my shout outs at the bottom. We ripped through both FFA’s for Halo 3 and COD 4 and got a good way through the GOW 4 Vs 4.

We phoned through to the Hotel during the day asking to keep the bar open as we’d be back sometime after 11. We closed around 10ish, had a quick bash on the games (I think) and headed back to the hotel for about 11.15. For the walking crew (me, Steve, Jay, Spin and razor) we walked into the hotel to find Chris and the new guy Dave arguing with the concierge. Apparently the message to keep the bar open wasn’t left and the bartender had gone home for the night. While we were faffing around dropping bags and shizzle (Stewart getting changed the cheeky cunt) to try and go somewhere to get a few beers. The concierge comes over and apologising for the inconvenience and offers to pay for taxis to and from a bar in town. FUCKING A!!!

We headed into town to the local wetherspoons, quite a nice place. We had 2 taxis, one bringing me, spin, Jay and Razor and one with Dave, Chris, Tempus and Steve. Our taxi driver did 115MPH down the motorway so we got there first and proceeded inside. We were told before getting there to take off our beanies/hats and to just straighten up a bit, lol. Me and Spin went in nee bother, Jay and razor fixed themselves up outside for a minute or two and headed in. ROFL, Razor got ID’d on the way in the door and he’s older than me! Spin generously offered to get the beers in and what a round it was. 8 beers and then he bought 8 shots of Tequila for us all as well, probably celebrating his first kid coming soon. Jay, the big girl of the group, refused the shot so spin had 2. We sat down and I proceeded to document the event and we found out that Mega pixels do not make a camera to Jay’s dismay. My camera PWN’s all. While Chris was at the bar with Dave, I gave Steve my phone and he was going through my photo’s and we came across one of the group ones and zoomed in on Chris. He looked just like Uncle Fester. Bluetooth, what an amazing invention. We sent it around to everyone’s phones and Jay and I have photoshop on our phones! Here is my attempt! After a few beers and a quick take away he headed back to the hotel via a mini bus and got to bed.

Up the next day bright and early and as usual, me and Spin are up and at breakfast first. Razor slept in to get his beauty sleep (that and not wanting breakfast) and we were soon followed by Chris and his Mrs. Apparently Boffy and Jay were already up and at the NEC, one of the alarm systems was going off and Jay rang me to find out where the zapper for it was. Of course Steve had taken it with him. Lets just say I don’t think I saw Steve til about 10am, lol. Nothing really event worthy on the Saturday, we got through the GOW finals and started on the COD 4 5 Vs 5 and the Halo 3 4 Vs 4….Except for Xg Minx showing me her ultrasound. Her and Xg Reaper are having a little baby! Ain’t that cute, an XL romance which turns into the first XL baby!

Now, I’d accidentally left my watch at my friends gaff in Brum so I left early on Saturday, headed back there and stayed at his. I met his cousin Kieran and we all just kicked back with a few beers etc and laughed at shit on youtube.

Easter Sunday I woke up and headed back to the NEC picking up a rolo egg on the way as it was Easter. Rocked up just after 10 or 11 I think and got back to work. I spent most of the day on the front desk as my IBS was crippling me as usual. I got chatting with Minx about Reaper. Apparently the burger van the NEC got was dishing out some nasty food and Luke (Reaper) had got food poisoning and was back at the hotel. Luke rocked up a bit later looking like shit. A bunch of us spent time at the front just chatting and having a laugh. Chris regaled us of a story which got him the nickname Uncle Fester Pants! Chris had got food poisoning as well, he rushed to the toilet and while sat on the toilet threw up in his pants! Becky and Simmer’s Mrs bought a couple of hotdogs from the Burger van, bit into them and found they were pink. Becky who had previously stolen these hotdogs took them back with Stomping freak as backup. Here’s a pick of Stomping freak giving Chris one. The burger vender was a bit too laid back about this for Stomping to deal with so he had a massive go and threatened to get food standards on them. Needless to say, 15 minutes later they had packed up and left!! XL 1 – 0 Burger van

Anyways, the day seemed to pass pretty quickly and there were some good matches being played with some of the top teams being penalised for breaking the rules. No one is above the law but quite a few people are above Jay :p About 10ish we kicked all the bad kids off the free play so the staff party could begin! Chris had bought a tonne of booze and ordered pizza’s for all the staff, the STO lot showed up with even more booze as well. I was PWNing Stace (Minx) at gears of war like I told her I would and then I moved onto a bit of COD 4. Then the pizza’s arrived and most of the staff went off to eat a bit and come back. I was playing and Luke popped up behind me and I realised there was a random bad kid sat next to me. I politely asked him to get off the consoles and then bitch slapped his puny white ass when he talked back to me. Note: I didn’t actually hit the kid just verbally PWN’d his ass and Luke was laughing his ass off about it.

A load of beers and some antics later, we left the NEC about 4.30am. Walked the UbiSoft chick Kas back to her hotel (as it was through a darkened wood and to see if her bar was open) and then Dave, Steve, Stewart, Jay and I went back to our hotel. Me, Dave and Steve took the easy route and Stewart and Jay decided to actually go through a forest to get there. LOL. Steve then came up with the devilishly good idea of going to wake up Razor and Spin (who I was sharing room with) and that’s exactly what we did. Jay went in and jumped on top of Spin and he has proof that they were sleeping together…I have the proof that he has proof. They left and I got some sleep. We all woke up around 10ish and headed to the NEC to pack up. The usual pissing about began and when Steve called Chris Uncle Fester…well you can see the picture at the top^^ Yup, he cello taped his face up. I got the train back with Steve and a guy called Edutech (but only for a little bit) and Steve was bouncing off the walls. I’d never known him to be this impatient.

I got home eventually, completely shot but it was worth it. Wednesday through to Monday with little to no sleep, partying and gaming, it was one of the best times of my life and something I really needed. I’ve come back and I’m actually happy for a change, I’m back to my old self. Anyways, the key moments.

Shout outs

Chris – for being Uncle Fester Pants.

Jay – for making sure I was ok for a change.

Steve – for not insulting me as much as usual.

Stace – For the entertainment.

Luke – for being a guy I can have a laugh with.

Boffy – for being himself.

Renegade – did not know this guy but turned out to be a Legend!

Dave – Legend!

Spin – for letting me crash with him and razor and always a top guy and funny as fuck. Didn’t get pissed off or anything at my stupid jokes. ROFL, GG dude.

Razor – for just being himself.

Nero – Blood!

Shadow – for being his usual self.

Melanie – for not kicking my ass when I clobbered her when she hugged me.

Simmer – My man, how can you not like Simmer?

Phrases of the weekend

GG

lulz

Roflcopter

SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI

All pics can be found on my facebook but if your not on facebook or have me on it click here and here.

Reeto lads. Recovering from my trip to brum for XL4 but rest assured there will be a write up of it sometime. The main topics to look forward to are:

1. My night in with my mate.
2. Setting up at XL and the great state i was in that day.
3. Getting a pint on the friday.
4. A new gamer is born.
5. Uncle Fester pants.
6. Pwning bad kids
7. Da party!

Oh and I may throw in some of the event but not likely. lol. I’ll do it all when I’ve recovered.

Yes, a couple of weeks ago was the third instalment of the XL lan event in the Birmingham NEC and it was exactly what I needed. I really didn’t think i was going to be able to make it but I did, with a little bit of funding from my parents of course. For those of you who don’t know, I work for a site called matchbox360. We’re a Xbox 360 gaming website and XL is our LAN business side of it. The first 2 events were a huge success and this one went really well. A few hiccups with this being our first full 360 event but other than that it was another success. Here’s a brief *cough* thats a lie *cough*.

I started off on Friday morning in Uni, dragging my big ass bag around (which i’ll get to later) had in it 16 cans of relentless. I spent a couple of hours in Uni before heading off to Picadilly. I got on the train and it only took about 2 hours to get to Birmingrad. I was hoping, that by leaving at 1ish, i would get there around 3ish and all the heavy lifting would be done. I got off the train and started walking towards the toute suite…on route i met up with Jay, Steve, tugy and Razor coming back from the bar. I get informed that Kon hadn’t even got to the toute suite with the truck with all the TV’s and shit in. Bugger!

We head back and are greeted by the usual folks, becky and boffy and a few people i’d never met before. We hang around and the gaskin bro’s turn up (they are my ride for this weekend) and soon after Kon shows up with the truck. Me, Steve and Jay hatch a plan to get out of the heavy lifting; we tell Kon we need to go check in. We’re sneaky.

So off to the hotel and check in. I took my bag up to my room and I found a big ass hole in the bottom of my big ass bag. Apprently, it had been draggin on the floor and created a big hole. This is bad enough but with all the relentless in my bag, one of the cans had exploded all over my staff t-shirt! Twas alright in the end, but i had the caffeine seeping into my skin all weekend. Anyway, we meet in the bar for a quick pint (but damn there was a huge line, took me 15mins to be served) and then off to the chippy for some scran. That’s where we saw this delightful thing on the menu:

We eventually get back to the NEC but to our dismay the heavy lifting was still going on. Well I couldn’t be bothered wit all that so i went to sleep set up the routers under a table for a while. After that Dan brought over spins hat and we came up with the game “Hide spins Hat” the rules are simple, you hide spins hat. I took the hat round all the staff and we took pictures of us all with it on. Take a look at them on my flickr account. After a few hours of that fun, we generally set up and got everything ready for the next day. We headed back to the hotel and got some sleep.

Woke up the next day and we were late…as usual. We got there and the bloody doors were locked so we were trapped outside with all the bad kids. We eventually got in and started making the place look pretty before we let the kiddies in. The first day is pretty much a blur. We got through a lot of GOW matches and we had a good laugh. I think the highlight of my day was Kon shouting at me for not knowing who Xg Melanie was. Apprently, at XL 2 there was a big who haa because she is gorgeous and a gamer. She remembered who I was but I couldn’t for the life of me remember her, and a girl this pretty, i usually fucking remember!!! But I digress.

Finished on schedule…ish, kicked the kiddies out and then headed back to the hotel. Steve, Jay and Liegh headed off to get a curry but I had plans with a mate. A guy i met on the Gamerfreakz site agreed to meet up with me at my hotel. Nero, got to my hotel around Midnight-ish and we hung out for a few hours. We headed up to my room and he pulled out 8 cans of Stella and a bottle of rum. We got waaasted! Nero went home (or to work, i don’t know which) and I got some sleep.

Late again to XL, set up and this day was a bit more hectic. Things didn’t really go to plan but at the end of the day, we got through the tournaments and we enjoyed ourselves. Towards the end of the day I was talking to Xg Melanie and we exchanged phone numbers so we could travel back together. Everyone was gobbsmacked that I got her number, but you know, that’s just the way I roll. Lol. We closed pretty late and headed back to the hotel. Me, Steve, Leigh and Jay all hung out in a room for a couple of hours (with me and Jay finishing off the Stella that Nero left me, cheers again for that dude) and then I headed down to see Tugsy kicking ass at Super Smash Bros melee on the gamecube for a bit before heading to bed.

Again, late to XL the next day, we packed up and I headed to the trainstation about one and met mel and the guys and we headed back to Manchester. The first train that came only let one of us on and then took off, so we had to met up at Birmingham New Street. When we met up again, we headed to the pub for a couple of pints and then headed back to Manchester. The other guys we were with were heading to Liverpool so me and Melanie had to find a train going to Manchester Airport and Picadilly. We just got on a train to Picadilly in the end and as we were pulling into one station (it was dark mind you) mel just turned to me and said “This really looks like the airport” comic timing being what it is, straight after there was an announcement about arriving at the airport. lol. Just lol.

I eventually got home around 6ish that night and just dropped dead for a bit. But that’s it, sorry its a bit late, been hella busy at uni.